Wasing Machine

Q: Why is a washing machine better than a blonde?

A: Because you can drop your load in a washing machine, and it won't follow you around for a week!

Confused Blonde

Q: How can you confuse a blonde?

A: Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.

Concentrate

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours?

A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.

Number Eleven

Q: Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven?

A: She didn't know what number came first.

Advice To Children

Banta ask santa: what will you

advise your children about marriage?

Santa declares: I’ll never marry in my life and

I’ll give same advice to my children also.

Tourist And Santa

Tourist: Whose Skeleton Is That?

Santa: Tipu Sultan’s Skeleton.

Tourist: And Smaller Skeleton Next To It?

Santa: Tipu’s When He Was Child

Inspector To Banta

Inspector to Banta: Faansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai?

Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..!

Airtel And Hutch Network

A dog was chasing Santa and he was laughing.

A bystander: why are u laughing?

Santa: I have a Airtel cell phone but still Hutch network is
following me.

Result

Santa: Tere result da ki banya?

Pappu: Miss kendi aay ais class wich ik saal hor laggay ga?

Santa: Saal pavain 2,3 lag jawan par fail na hovin mera puter.

Banta Ki Ghar Ladka Hua

Banta k ghar ladka hua, par wo phir bhi dukhi tha?? Kyon?

Itne saalo baad, itni manato k baad ladka hua wo bhi chhota sa...!

Santa To Plumber

Why did santa ask plumber to come to his college?

Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking.

Titanic

Titanic was sinking.
An englishman asked Santa, “How far is land”?

Santa: 2 KMs.

Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction (left or right)?

Santa: Downwards!

Santa And Man

Man: Santa g where were U born? Santa g: Punjab.

Man: Which part?

Santa g: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body Is born in Punjab Yar.

Similarity Between Marriage And 11;59pm

Banta: What's the similarity between Marriage and 11:59pm?

Santa: Dono k baad 12-bajte hain aur din badal jate hain.

Tube Light

Santa was standing below a tube light with a open
mouth

WHY?

Because his doctor advised him "Today's dinner should be light"

Girl Friend Or Wife

Banta: Life ko kaun zyada achhaa bana sakti hai, Girlfriend ya Wife?


Santa: WIFE. Bas, honi kisi aur ki chahiye!

Santa Closed Bank Account

Santa had a dream in which someone murdered him.
Next day he closed his bank account. Know why?

Because the bank's slogan was:
We make your dreams come true...

He Was Sleeping

Q: Why did Santa look into the mirror with his eyes closed?

A: Because he wanted to see how he looked when he was sleeping.

Delivered

Santa: Why are you so happy?

Banta: I sent an SMS text message to my wife who is pregnant wishing her and instantly it says DELIVERED.

Butterfly

Q: Why did Santa throw the butter out of the window?

A: He wanted to see butterfly!